How To Build Self‐ Control

Make a list of the positives and
negatives in your life.Write down a list of
which areas of your life are suffering and
which are prospering. Focus on the
essentials in order to keep the list brief.

*.Take a look at the areas you suck with.
Brainstorm ways to deal with them. If you
are failing all of your classes in school,
you might need to study! If you are
gaining weight at an alarming rate, you
may need to sacrifice a few candy bars.

Think of causes and solutions to every
problem that you write down.

.Recognize that you are not the only one
with this problem. People often refer to
poor self-control when they have
problems with diet, exercise, work or
study habits, addictions, and emotional
behavior. These are all parts of life that
many people find difficulty regulating.

Research the area in which you are
lacking control. Read books or articles
about the area you are having difficulty
with. Becoming informed makes it much
easier to make the right decision when
you're tempted to overdo something. For
example, if you want to lose weight,
taking the time to read about nutrition
and healthy dieting will naturally motivate
you and make eating right much more
enjoyable. In terms of gaining self-
control, knowledge really is power!
*.If you have friends with similar
problems, ask them about their own
experiences. By comparing notes, you
might get tips on the coping mechanisms
and strategies that they use. It also helps
to have reassurance that struggling with
self-control does not make you a weak
person.

Act On Your Analysis
1 Gradually increase your ability for self-
denial.Start small by challenging yourself
to control your behavior for a short
period of time. For example, if you are
addicted to television, try turning it off for
one day. Then work up to leaving it off
for two days, then longer. If you are
struggling with your diet, promise
yourself to only eat one dessert item a
day. For every decision you make, leave
room to gradually increase the level of
self-denial.
*.Don't try to break your destructive habit
all at once. This is likely to lead to a
dramatic "falling off the wagon" that will
leave you feeling depressed and hopeless.

2 Enlist your friends and family to help
you.Tell your family to remind you of
your goals whenever you fall back into
bad behaviors. A friendly reminder is all
that's required. Constant nagging will
only make you hide and sneak around.
*.Family and friends can also join you in
alternative actions when you're having
trouble controlling yourself. For example,
if your friends are drinking and you're
trying to abstain, ask if one of them
wouldn't mind joining you in a trip to get
some ice cream.

3 Distract yourself.When you feel the
urge to lose your self-control,
immediately think of something else you
could be doing. Go for a walk. Write a
thank you card. Drink a glass of water.
This will derail the train of thought and
give you time to regain your self-
discipline.

4 Learn how to relax. Part of self-control
is learning how to relax and to ease the
tension. Research different methods of
relaxing your body and mind and decide
which best suits you.
*.Consider meditation. Meditation is all
about discipline, and the point of it is to
discipline your mind to such a state where
it remains clear, while positive energy
flows through you. You're meant to not
anchor yourself to specific thoughts.
Practicing meditation may give you a
sense of renewed self-disciple,
concentration, and happiness.
*.Try deep breathing. This is something
you can do wherever you are. Simply
close your eyes. Exhale completely. Inhale
slowly, counting up to four and hold the
breath, counting up to seven. Then
release the breath very slowly, counting
up to eight.